Sunday, November 30, 2008

Secrets revealed

( this post was originally drafted back in November I am posting it now to annouces the enws :) I am currently 10 weeks pregnant, we kept it a secret from our parents up until Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. The next few post were formed within the weeks since we have found out. I stopped posting at the 7th weeks because I became sotired I just had no desire to do anything, but from weeks 8-10 I have started to feel better, Below are the two videos from when we told our mothers, the first one is my mother the second one is Bills mother.)

Pregnancy Week 6

Sooooo…remember that Arby’s Beef and Cheddar I wanted last night?

Oh yeah….it’s like that……for the past few weeks I have had that……”I am nauseous…….not wait no I’m not…no wait… I am…yup I am.”…..OOOHHHHHHH Chips!!!!!!” …5 minutes later…..ugh…..chips……..”

Finally last night after coming home and murdering an Arby’s Beef and cheddar combo, I realized, yeah I better take a test. So…I took three……..
Hey gotta make damn sure right?

I kind of just stared at it, with my jaw open, we weren’t planning on it RIGHT NOW, more like next August, but I think this a serious blessing, and this is happening for a reason.

I finally got up enough of my motor skills to go down stairs and show the hubby, I showed him and he cried, then I cried and then I laughed, and cried again, then I hyperventilated, and cried again…….then I ate some more French fries.

I know it sounds funny but I actually feel swollen, like my belly is swollen. To quote Heather on “DOOCE” “I can smell your pores” and am sick to my stomach on and off. But am trying to handle it the best I can, due to an ongoing weak stomach, I have felt queasy most of my life, so hopefully that will give me the energy to push through this.

Trying to sleep last night was damn near impossible, first I was freezing then I was lying in a pool of my own sweat, then I had to pee. Then when I finally did fall asleep I had to get up for work lol……welcome to mother hood right?

I haven’t told my parents as of yet, or Bills family, we are keeping it quiet until Christmas Eve. At least we are going to try to keep it that way, which means I have to keep my mouth shut when talking to my mother and seeing her face to face for the next three and a half weeks!!! Holy crap!

See, what we want to do, is this. I am going to go to the craft store, and get two little eenie weenie plastic babies, then I am going to wrap them up in little tiny blankets and put them into a small jewelry box. I will wrap one for my mom and dad and one for Bills mom and dad. And at Christmas when everyone is over, they will open them as gifts!! I hate keeping the secret from my mom for so long, but I really want to wait until I see the doctor and see a beating heart, and know that everything is ok. I go between fits of giggles and crying. It’s crazy lol.

As far cravings are concerned, besides said Roast beef and cheddar sandwich. I have wanted pickles and Green Olives, what I haven’t been able to stomach? Anything with leaves on it, can’t do salad at all L and the though of turkey………….ewwwww………….

So that is were I am at right now, I want to record everything as this is my first pregnancy, and I was going to start separate blog, but I thought, why bother? My blog name means Joy of Life. And this ….well…..this is just the greatest joy that I could hope for.:)

7 Weeks Still nauseous

So now I am wondering if it's possible to be queasy and craving something at the same time? my nausea has been nearly constant, and while no food sounds good to me, when I do get food in front of me and start eating, I feel fine, then back to sick to my stomach directly after.

I called my old friend Michelle last night, and she really made me feel better, she said the feelings that i am having (anxiety,"oh shit what am I going to do") are completely normal. she also told me not to get too attached because I could still miscarry, which has ran in my moms side of the family,so I know the threat of that could be somewhat real, still i try not to worry about it much.

Whats frustrating to me, is how much I feel like complete shit, any woman who says she loves being pregnant needs to be sucker punched because she has to be lying, this is not "awesome" I feel like crap, I don't want to visit friends or go anywhere, not to mention the fact that my parents don't know yet and I have to talk to my mom every day and manage not to tell her about this secret festering inside of me, I mean that takes alot of work to keep that shit in . It's no wonder I nap every day. Even as I sit here I feel like vomiting, but you know what?.......throwing up is too much work!

People keep asking if i am happy and I say "yeah i am, in those brief moments of clarity when I am not freaking out over labor or trying to keep my food down."

So in order to ease my mind, I have been making contact with my gals who have had babies, trying to get the lowdown from them, and although everyone is different, talking to them really helps me to be less scared.

I am going to go cry into a bag of cheetos now, ........then throw them back up.

Week 7 Cont.

I’m starting to feel better, although not physically, but mentally at least, I read every day, she is only 2 months ahead of me, so I feel I can relate. Today I was so relived to read that she hates being pregnant, “she hates it?.....SERIOUSLY?? People like me exist?” I thought that your supposed to love being pregnant and how much of a woman you feel like and oh what a blessing. Blessing maybe, but for gods sake, what this is doing to my body is hell.

I woke up this morning, swearing to god that I smelled………..Infection…….I know that’s weird but I smell it, and it’s in my nose, I cannot get the smell out, I have tried perfume, everything. NOTHING works.

I also have a terrible intolerance to cold. And living here in Cleveland near a large frozen body of water doesn’t really help that issue.

I walked into work today and my manger asked me how I was feeling (seeing the green look on my face, the saltines and ginger tes in hand) I said “like shit actually” she just laughed and so did a few other women near by, that ticked me off, I was like “whats so funny? WHY is my suffering funny???” that just irks the hell out of me. Lol.

The only thing that seems to be lifting a bit, and this may be due to the Prenatal vitamins I am taking, is my exhaustion, I was able to do far more yesterday that I have been able to do previously, and while I still feel a bit tired, I may actually make it out to visit my Friend Julia’s new house tonight, before coming home and going straight to bed.

Every day that goes by where I do not tell my mom, I pat my self on the back, so far keeping the secret has been rather easy. Hopefully that continues.

I do have one good thing to say about all of this…..last night in a brief reprieve from Nausea, I gorged on Veggie chips and fat free French onion dip, and it was………….the most spectacular thing in the world. Food really does taste tastier when you are pregnant. And I know it may be strange, but music sounds better……any kind of music, I crave music like some women crave pickles lately, and when I hear it, it’s almost orgasmic!

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Blogs you need to check out (because I said so)

Ok really you don’t have to do what I say…….but seriously you should DEFINITELY check these talented peoples blogs out.

The Freelancers Fashion Blog

This blond bombshell serves up the fashion tasties routinely,she is multi talented and can pull an outfit together in a jiffy.
(Sigh) she makes me want to move to Finland. Go tot this site for your daily dose of Kitsch and class!!
I found this by accident, this woman is awesome, a “fallen “ Mormon with some of the best dry humor around,
Check out her fun musings about motherhood, and of course her” daily Chuck” pictures of her cute dog chuck balancing things on his head, “Daily Style” and “daily photo”.

Girls Gone Child
Rebbecca Woolf is a frickin goddess, even if you don’t have children, you are sure to love this cool rocking moms site, from fun stories about modern parenthood, to everything you weren’t sure you wanted to know about pregnancy, this girl lays it down.

Gala Darling .com

Have I mentioned this gal before? I just love her!! She is from New Zealand but frequents the states, with her bright pink hair and her sparkling personality, this girls blogs on style and general life issues , brightens up my day! Be sure to check out her “style tips” posts, where she gives fun and wacky suggestions to make your life more fun.

Clever Blog Name Here:
Ok I am not only biased because this is my beautiful cousin Ashley, but this girl is also waaaay talented. Check out her awesome photography…girls got mad skills yo……..mad. And also check out her other site; for fun photo challenges!!

Ok now go….. read peoples!!!!!!!

Now Excuse me while I bury my face into a tasty Arbys Beef and Cheddar Sandwich..........ahhhhh PMS........

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Christmas Wishlist

Yes I know Thanksgiving hasn't even come yet, but what the hell here is my Christmas wish list.
I am not wishing for much this year, because truth be told I don't really NEED much

In no particular order

- Victoria's Secret "Love Spell" body spray and lotion

- Victoria's Secret "Very Sexy Dare" Perfume

- Fossil Watches (either of these will do!)

-The 40 year Old Virgin (one of my FAVE movies!)

-The best Of Big Chuck and Little John (if your a native to Cleveland you know how important this is) if you are not a native to Cleveland, these guys have been on the air doing funny skits since I was a wee little girl, I LOVE THEM!!! They are Cleveland!!
-Leopard Pillow top Isotoner Slippers

-A leather jacket ( I don't have a picture because the one I want I cant find the picture of it)
my husband has a Harley and it was a bad ass Harley Jacket that I saw a few months ago with a pink sweatshirt liner, it was sharp as hell!!! And perfect for freezing Cleveland Weather.
-Gift cards to Forever 21, Target, Sephora and Ann Taylor.
I almost feel weird having a non elaborate list this year but honestly, I have just about everything I could really want, and I guess that is a wonderful thing!! Of course I also love the little thoughtful things I get from friends and family , those are always nice Surprises :)

....So what are YOU wishing for??????

Tuesday, November 18, 2008


Damn you lake effect snow!!!!!!!....................that is all

Friday, November 14, 2008

Have you smiled at someone today?

Photo by Sick Little Monkey
I have had a real nasty day thus far, my day started off with me getting into two altercations with customers, one of which landed me in my managers office going through cantankerous emails and defending myself until I was blue in the face.

Then once that calmed down, I had a customer who thought it was his duty to let all of his political aggression and frustration out on me in the form of screaming at me for not having and answer for him.

After that fun jaunt, I got a letter from management stating that we may have to work the holidays (great like I don’t hate this place enough sometimes, just take away my right to be with my family to REALLY boost my morale!!)

After my customer altercation, i had a coworker who saw me in the bosses office text message me on the computer asking what had happened I wrote back “oh just some dumb ass customer trying to get me in trouble” the problem??? I didn’t send it to my friend I sent it on accident to management…..GREAT!!!!!!! Who replied “please do not talk to anyone until you have calmed down”

So I thought I would get out for lunch, so I head out to Panera Bread, I walk into the door and….OMG!! people ALL over the place, granted the service was fast but very rushed and no one was very personable, so finally I get my tasty lunch (orchard harvest salad and chicken soup) sit down and try to replenish my mind, choosing not to listen to the thoughts in my head, but rather to the guy behind me talking about some interesting real estate options to another customer. After I was done, I stopped by the cafĂ© for steamed soy milk with whip cream. So I stand there at the counter…..and stand there……..aaaaaaaaaaaand stand there. Finally a girl moseys on over and looks at my request like I just asked her for the whole world. She enters it, I pay. And then it happened……A manager comes over to the counter and tells her he will make the drink for me. So as he is steaming my millk, (that sounds kind of dirty) he smiles at me! And says, “so how is your day today?” I smile and say “well it’s been trying” he finishes my milk and hands me a medium sized cup of steamed milk with whip cream. “OH” I said, “I paid for a small”. He goes “I know, but I figured you could use a treat”…….and I swear, that guy smiling at me and doing that for me, made the whole rest of my afternoon, POOF!! Went my bad mood. And I swear to you, as I walked out the door, (which BTW a nice gentleman held open for me) the sun came out!!!!

So I ask you to smile at somebody today, it may just be that little thing that makes their day better. We need a lot more people like that in the world.

Here is a song by Ani Difranco that I LOVE that came to mind after this all occurred:

PIXIE by Ani Difrancoi'm a pixiei'm a paperdolli'm a cartooni'm a chipper cheerful free for alland i light up a roomi'm the color me happy girlmiss live and let liveand when they're out for bloodi always givethe man behind the counter looks like he's gota half a dozen places he'd rather beand furthermore it looks like he's preparedto take it all out on mebuddy, i don't really care what your problem isjust don't make it minecome on kids, let's all hold handsand pretend we're having a good timemaybe you don't like your jobmaybe you didn't get enough sleepwell, nobody likes their jobnobody got enough sleepmaybe you just hadthe worst day of your lifebut, you know, there's no escapeand there's no excuseso just suck up and be niceall the privileged white kids on tvplaying at deathbrandishing their cold cutswith their ghostly makeupand their heroin breathand all the little fishes are flapping wildlyon their hookswhile all the top critics find great meaningin the telephone bookthe little emperor he has no clothesso he can't come out to playand besides which life is sufferingand he likes it that wayand the little guy is not so friendlybut you know life has been cruelso wipe that smile off your face babyand try to be coolyeah, i would like to perfect the artof being studiously alooflike life is just a boring choreand i am living proofi could join forces with an armyof ornery hipstersbut then i guess i'd be out of a jobso i guess that's out of the picture

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Friends and Funerals

I had a funeral last night, nothing too traumatic, just a family friend from a long long time ago, but it was nice because I got to see the kids I grew up with living at my parents old house in Lorain, Ohio. We all laughed as we caught up on our lives and were pleased that everyone turned out ok, we shared stories about when we were little and we swore SWORE I tell you, that we saw a sasquatch in the Lorain cemetery, and the time we tried to get my friends brother to drink muddy water, telling him it was chocolate milk. (never fell for it despite our feverish attempts) The kids I grew up with were mainly boys, which I why I guess that I was a bit of a tomboy as a little girl, barbies really weren’t my thing, no, you could always find me up in a tree somewhere or playing army on the dirt mound in the back yard, or kickball.

After my parents moved, I got more girly friends and sort of dropped the tom boy routine, but still to this day my husband doesn’t believe that I was once a sporty kind of gal.

The evening ended off nicely, sitting at my parent’s living room eating fabulous chocolate cake that my dad made and just talking general memories.

When I finally did return home, I was greeted by a husband in a wonderful mood and a package (OHHHHHH) my new phone came (YAY!!) so I cannot wait to get home tonight and mess with it! Also got some crafting planned tonight, I am making and OBAMA magnet for my grandmother (she LOVES Obama) and do the transfer for my necklace, I promise I will get photos up by the end of the week……..seriously…..

Sunday, November 9, 2008

....Well at least I MADE a roast this weekend

Yesterday I went to the MADE in the 216 show at Room Service, and "SWOON"!!! my NEW fave store, lots of really kewl original stuff just waiting for me to purchase. Sadly yesterdays I was out of money, but now that I know were the store is, Julia and I will have to trek back down for some Christmas shoppin! Check out these three local based artists that I really dug. And you thought Cleveland had nothing to offer......... Super Industrial Love

Afterwards, Julia and I went to Bella Dubby for some tasty hot coffee deliciousness, then my plans to go grocery shopping and do some crafting were derailed, when I suddenly felt like total shit. So I spent the afternoon huddled up on the couch under a comforter sleeping it off. But the hubby came home and brought me some food and took care of me.

Today we got alot of shopping done and hey look at that!! I made a roast!!! See I DID craft something today :) I may still make a necklace tonight but......meh.........maybe just a bit more rest first :)

Saturday, November 8, 2008

It's beginning to look alot like........


Aside from being sick today (stupid cold) I am so excited, Julia and I are heading to ROOM SERVICE for a Local artists show!! I can't wait to gather new inspiration!

Also my wonderful father recently picked up a craft magazine for me and inside, it shows how to make resin rings, which is perfect because I just got the hang of using resin to clear coat my clay pendants, (which by the way is going very well, I will put up pics soon, I promise)

Aside from making my jewelry, I also want to make a new Christmas wreath for the front door,
I saw one I liked the one I want to make on this great gals site. Except I was thinking of trying to make one entirely out of Christmas bulbs. I am also making miniature clay food for my coworkers, I am using the food dishes each coworker is known for bringing to parties, and making a teeny tiny sized sculpture of it.

WHEW!!! i got allot to do! not to mention making Christmas sugar cookie cut outs and for the first time in my life , I am making my father famous fudge for Christmas, (read: honored)

I will up date more on these projects as I finish them!

now off to go make my self look decent for my crafting-art coma.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008


YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Today will be the best day EVER!! EVER I SAY!!!!

Monday, November 3, 2008

Election Fashion!

So in light of tommorrows elections (FINALLY) I have chosen two outfits sets.

This one is if Obama Wins, very patriotic in blue and red and cream. I LOVE these red patent shoes with the blue in the skirt.

OBAMA set by Heather5259

....and if Obama loses and McCain wins, all black with tissues in a leather box (because I will be in mourning) Booo :(

McCain by Heather5259

Here is to crossing my fingers!!!!!!!!!!!!!xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Saturday, November 1, 2008



So yesterday was Halloween, and since our company is being nice to us, they decided to let us dress up for work, I wasn't really into getting completely dolled up this year, so I just did something simple, I went as "dizzy" I crafted a wreath out of stars and doves, you know like when you hit your head or get dizzy you see birds and stars???? Get it??.....not many people did, they thought I was an angel, but once I explained to them that 1...I am NO angel....and 2. What it REALLY was, they got it and thought it was clever. Still we had a ton of food, and it really made the day go by nicely.
My Slightly lame but last minute head piece costume

George AKA "Georgette" at work dressed as a woman. he walked around all day asking if anyone knew where it was ladies night.
This man even shaved his legs and painted his nails!!!!!!

Then, when we got home we built a bonfire and invited the neighbors down the street over for Pizza and beers, and handed out candy to the whopping 12 kids that came down our street, still it was fun and we stayed out side bullshitting until about 12.

Today we are going Bowling in Kent with Our friends Lindsay and Kevin, so I m off to go get ready!!