Thursday, February 10, 2011

Let it be......

My mother used to have this necklace that as far back as I can remember, she used to wear, it’s a small gold cross, my grandfather gave her on her first communion, along side a small emerald and diamond pendant, hanging from a very delicate gold chain. She was wearing the cross in her engagement picture and many other pictures until her passing. She always had it on, she showered with it on , slept with it on, it was a part of her. Even if she was wearing other jewelry she usually had this necklace on underneath, hanging right above her heart.
When she passed and I was cleaning out her stuff, I packed up the delicate necklace because I couldn’t bear to even see it. I do wear one of her rings, it only fits on my pinky lol, and I occasionally look into her jewelry box that sits atop my dresser, and handle her rings and earrings, in an effort to feel close to her. But never bothered putting on the necklace.
Recently, my life has been in a bit of turmoil, I have done something’s that I was not proud of, and hurt people I never really wanted to. I let some people down, I miss my mom, I am frustrated with my career, a whole slew of things. As this has been going on, I keep feeling her necklace “call to me” a feeling and pull to put it on, the more I ignored it, the louder the call got.
My faith used to be and still is a big part of me, just a bit more subdued now that it used to be,I talk to God and Mom all the time, and based on the angel we saw the night mom died, I KNOW there is a higher power and seeing that angel just re-enforced it for me. I don’t want to say I have been “finding my way to god” but rather finding my way back in general to the faith that used to bring me peace. I do not go to church or participate in the sacrament, I believe in just “open faith”. In the point that I do not have to belong to a religion or church to have a relationship with God,he is all around and I can talk to him any time that I please.
Last night on the way home from work I was asking him to help me fully realize my blessings and help get me on the right path. I felt a sense of calm wash over me, and the call once again from that necklace tucked inside a satin bag in my linen closet.
I love my family, I love most of what my life has afforded me, and going through all of this has brought me closer to my faith,I know with that and help of my loved ones, I can move past this rough patch in my life.
Last night while Hudson was in the tub, I pulled out the necklace, cleaned it off, polished it up, and put it on……




It’s going to be a good year from now on……

When I find myself in times of trouble
Mother Mary comes to me
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be

And in my hour of darkness
She is standing right in front of me
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be

Let it be, let it be
Let it be, let it be
Whisper words of wisdom
Let it be

And when the brokenhearted people
Living in the world agree
There will be an answer, let it be

For though they may be parted
There is still a chance that they will see
There will be an answer, let it be

Let it be, let it be
Let it be, let it be
Yeah, there will be an answer let it be
( From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/b/beatles-lyrics/let-it-be-lyrics.html )

Let it be, let it be
Let it be, let it be
Whisper words of wisdom
Let it be

Let it be, let it be
Let it be, yeah, let it be
Whisper words of wisdom
Let it be

And when the night is cloudy
There is still a light that shines on me
Shine on until tomorrow, let it be

I wake up to the sound of music
Mother Mary comes to me
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be

Yeah, let it be, let it be
Let it be, yeah, let it be
There will be an answer, let it be

Let it be, let it be
Let it be, yeah, let it be
Whisper words of wisdom
Let it be

2 comments:

Mary Elizabeth said...

Oh sweetie. My eyes are full of tears and I wish I could just hug you. This was so beautifully written. I also wear the necklace my Grandmother wore everyday above my heart. You have such a sweet soul. Thinking of you.

Mrs Munster said...

Lovely post. I think it's good your keeping this piece of jewellery close to your heart!

I have to write back bout your last comment in my blog re:hip carrier cause it is the best thing I've bought. You can actually use it until the lil one is bout 3 years. It has really saved my back on those days when my lil man is wanting to be carried (around the house especially). I use it together with a "ring sling" (fabric sling again up till 3 years) for extra support and for hands free carrying. I recommend highly getting the hip carrier as Hudson's not too old for it :)