The nursery!

My hospital bag is packed, and the bassinet is ready! I am ready to go!!!

36 Weeks

I am feeling a bit better this week, physical therapy gave me a machine called a TENS unit, bascially it is these 4 electrodes you hook up to your back and it sends electric impluses into your nerves to help them relax. While it doesn't fix the pain compleltely, it does enable me to be maybe 10 percent more comfortable, wich is wonderful.

I also had to suck it up and let Bills mom bring over a porta-potty chair, (because I sleep in the living room and can't make it up the stairs 4 times a night to pee) oh yeah, were ALLLL ol lady over here! But my diginity flew out the window weeks ago lol so I really don't care, besides you have NO IDEA how nice it is to just waddle to the dining room to pee LOL. TMI I know.

We finally got the nursery done, my mom came over the other day and helped me,then made us dinner and even did some laundry for us, it was SO nice to be taken care of lol.
We just need to put up the curtains and get the mattress for the crib. My mother even packed my hospital bag!

On Friday I will be at 36 Weeks! So really I don't have far to go (thank god). And I am sleeping more now during the day, I am just so damn tired.

Well I get checked on tues the 30th to see if I dilated, I don't expect that I have but there is no sense in NOT hoping right?

Also the 30th is my two year wedding anniversay,sadly the only action that I will be getting that day is from my doctor LOL.

Everytime that I am feeling down, I just pull out his little outfits that I washed in baby detergent, and take inthe new baby smell, and somehow, I feel better.

35 weeks quick update

ok ok so I have been slacking a bit, but honestly the baby has dropped down, my back hurts worse, ( my doctor is full of shit if she thinks him dropping was going to make things better)I can barley walk and this heat is going to kill me. My shower was awesome! We got tons and tons of stuff, I washed all the baby clothes and now I am working on putting them away and finishing up the nursery. SIGH thank god it is almost over lol. The doctor is going to check me in two weeks, but I have dropped and am feeling pressure, wich is a good thing.

Here are some pics from the shower, I will write again when I feel better.

Julia (super party planner) and IMy Friend Kristal who traveled allllllll the way three hours north just to see me :)My pregnant partner in crime at work my friend Gretchen, she is one month behind me. My Friend Cathy measuring my belly for a game My mom and I
Holy mother of GOD I look MASSIVE here lol, Me the hubby and our pup outside of our house.
Julia actually MADE this for me! She is a terrific seamstress!!!

And she made this.....

And these!
I also got the super cute bouncer I wanted, lol I think I have played with this thing more than the baby will lol.

He got tons of socks, shoes , diapers, bottles, outfits, toys and fun stuff! Now I gotta get crackin on thank you notes!

Want to see something funny, watch how hard it is for me to get in the hubbys pick up truck lol. This actually wasn't as bad as it was when I got in on the way to the shower that was HILARIOUS!

"Letting the days go by, let the water hold me down......"

I went to therapy tues, and saw the new specialist, as soon as I walked in ion my crutches she knew exactly what what wrong, do you have any idea what relief that is? when someone KNOWS what is wrong with you!? She confirmed it's because of the hormone relaxin, which loosens the ligaments in the pelvis to allow the room for the baby, my hips are basically "loose" and unstable, and the ligaments that I do have are over worked and not handling the stress very well, this is all because I have had serious injuries to my pelvis over the years.

She told me to shun all the other exercises that the other women gave me, because get this.....IT WILL MAKE ME WORSE!!!! yeah no shit!! so she gave me new ones that were gentler and that I can do while sitting. She also suggested I do water therapy because of the extent of my pain and the weight of the pregnancy. I was ecstatic!! ......now, getting a maternity suit?....not so much...
but I braved the harsh fluorescent lights at target and after a 15 minute struggle to gt my pants off and the damn thing on, I just went with the first one i got on, a black little number with a skirt on it, it's a total "mom suit" but it works lol. it was better than the stripes and dots ones I saw on the rack next to it, are you freaking kidding me???? Like I want to look BIGGER!

I had my first water session today, after I had lunch with My friend Nicole, I headed over to the YMCA for the treatment, I got out of the car and was in so much freaking pain I saw stars, I limped in on my crutches and asked if the front desk girl could walk me back to the pool,I was really to afraid to walk by myself. I sat down on the bench and waited for the therapist to come over, struggling to get my pants off in the mean time, she finally had to come over and take them off for me, (for god sakes I don't know why I just don't wear a damn dress lol) she walked me to the pool, and as I got deeper in, I felt the weight of the baby disappear, although the pain was still bad,having that pressure off was phenomenal! We tired a few exercises that just made it worse, then finally she sat me down on an underwater bench and just had me slowly move my legs back and forth in the water, I did this for about 30 minutes while her and i chatted about "how i got so lucky to be pregnant AND on crutches" I of course resisted telling her the details of how I ended up in this whole situation ( prego) it was pretty x rated lol.

After 30 minutes my pain subsided greatly, she walked me out of the pool and as soon as I hit the shallow end I felt the weight of the baby again, and the pain came right back, I joked around and told her I wanted to just live in the pool until he comes out lol. She said that at least I will get temporary relief, and I have to go twice a week.So here is to hoping it does SOMETHING.

I was in SO much pain when I got home I had Bill help me out of the car , took a tylenol which was worth noting basically) and laid on the couch with the heating pad.
I can't even say that it gets better day by day because it doesn't, leaving the house is the worst, and if you ever wake up in the middle of the night around 4 am, think of me, because that's about the time I am slowly making my way up thirteen stairs (because I am sleeping on the couch) so that I can go to the bathroom, and that my friends has to be the most painful part of my day. But you know despite all of this shit, I am excited and can't wait to meet my lil guy who is already a literal "PAIN IN THE ASS" :)

Well as I have been writing this I have been waiitng for my highlights to process, so I better go rinse them out now.

My Shower is on sunday and I cannot wait! Ecspecially to wear my new dress!! I will post lots of pics, promise :)

Well...there went my dignity......Long post and probably TMI

I have now officially lost my dignity , literally overnight.

Yesterday Julia came over and painted the nursery for me, which I was really grateful for. It is finally all painted and pretty, we just have to decorate it now! I will post pics soon.

My husband, the wonderful man that he is,knew i was pretty beat from doing that yesterday (even though I really wasn't able to do anything but sit and and keep her company) and decided to take me out for dinner to get these nachos that I have been craving for like MONTHS!

We get to the Brew Kettle and I devoured my nachos until I was about to bust. they tasted soooooooo good. As i was getting up I felt like I really had to pee, the trouble was I didn't want to walk down the super long corridor to the bathroom, in my waddling hardly walking state, but I had to go as bad I really didn't have a choice, so off I went limping past the bar, where I used to be dressed up in my tight jeans and low cut tops, loving how guys would look at me and think "wow, her husband is one lucky man" now those stares turned into "oh my good lord that poor woman" and "what the hell is wrong with her?" as I walked by them with my two pirate peg legs, a shuffling. I made it to the bathroom and some woman stares at me as I enter, and I feel like saying "whats the mater? never seen a pregnant woman before?" i struggle for about 3 minutes to lower myself onto the toilet, And here is the sucky part, for some reason ( and it is ok to laugh here because I do) it is such a struggle for me to sit down, that when my butt finally reaches the seat, I pass gas, without even trying! Which means, that lady in the bathroom probably heard me do this, and I really didn't care by that point, I was just glad that I MADE it to the bathroom lol.

I walked back to the table and the hubby and I laughed about how pathetic I really look, we then needed to go to The Home Depot, to pickup stuff for the baby's room. Bill wanted me to ride a wheel chair because my legs were so bad, I refused, i said that a cart would be just fine. But halfway through the paint section my legs just gave out on me and I nearly collapsed. Bill caught my hips and almost in tears I go sucked it up and go "get the damn wheelchair please" and he pushed me around the store as we picked up what we needed. it was nice, but kind of embarrassing at the same time. Him and i cracked jokes about it and he made me laugh like good husbands do.

We got home and I was barley able to make it to the floor to do my physical therapy exercises, so when I was done he laid on the floor with me (because I couldn't get up) and we watched a show on summer time treats and how they were made.

I eventually go into the shower, put on my nighty and got on the couch.

Here is where it gets ugly, and shameless. We went to bed around 10pm, I woke up at 12 to pee, got back into bed, and then around 3 i woke up because I had a nightmare that I saw blood. when i woke I felt funny, something.....wet........"oh shit" I though, the pillow I had between my legs was soaked and so where the sheets. i panicked and raced to the bathroom as fast as my little broken legs would take me, 'DID my water break?" I panicked, I remembered from our labor class, think of the word Taco. Time the water broke in your pregnancy (in this case 33 weeks) Actuality of amniotic fluid (the chances were pretty slim that it was) Color 9 it was clear not pink) and Odor ( thankfully it didn't have that amniotic fluid smell, but it didn't smell like pee either) I began to calm down a bit. I walked into the bedroom and woke up Bill, he was very understanding, I was very embarrassed. He helped me throw the sheets in the wash and we camped out on the couches for the rest of the night. I took two Tylenol and fell back asleep until 9 am. I haven't "peed the bed" since I was 9, and I still cannot believe I did that!!!!!! I lost every ounce of dignity i had left last night, but I guess that how it goes.

on the way home from breakfast this morning, i had Bil stop at the drug store and I got those old lady "pee your pants pads" because I am afraid I will do it again! i really didn't care, I bought those and a Gopher Picker upper thing, so that I could get my pants on when my leg wont move enough for me to do so the normal way. I swear when I saw that thing in the store today, it was like Christmas, I love it, I have been going around all morning picking up tings with it and freaking the dog out by reaching out and tapping him on the back with it lol.

My legs seem to get worse every day, and I cant even imagine what will happen when this kids drops.But I have therapy tomm, which I am not looking forward to, and my Baby Shower on Sunday, which I hope to make it to!After that, this kid can some anytime that he wants, and hopefully its sooner rather than later, because really I have nothing else to lose.

32/33 weeks part two,barely walking the line of sanity

WHOOOAAAA mama!!

So it finally happened, the day after my physical therapy appt. this week, I was in so much pain I could barely move, our medical team at work and our hr department, wanted me to look into early medical leave,I am not getting around well at all at work and have nearly tripped on my own two swollen feet numerous times. These are not your normal pregnancy aches and pains, mine are much more serious, I have a slightly displaced hip and a condition called Pelvic Girdle Pain , which basically amounts to "my ass literally hurts so bad that I cant sit stand or lie in the same position for more than 30 minutes at a time." pain int he ass for sure. I tried to make it through work as much as humanly possible but after nearly a month and a half of constant pain, with little to no relief from Therapy, I had had it.

I waddled into my doctors office tues morning, she wants to do it on a week to week basis,meaning I have to be monitored and come and see her every week.i am fully confident this wont get any better until I have this child.But she wants me to commit to two rounds a pyshical therapy a week plus one chiropractic appt, every other week. I said "whatever I have to do"

If I would have one thing to say to women who are thinking of becoming pregnant it would be this, build up your leg , back and abdominal muscles!!! Because weak muscles is what gotme in this condition to begin with, not to mention i have Fibromayalgia, ( a inflammation of the muscle tissue) which makes matters worse. it's one of the reasons my muscles aren't as strong as some, people without this condition are very athletic and active, I have to be careful just how hard I work out at one time, or I am down for the count for weeks.
what really has irked me, are those people (and few at that) who have hinted at the fact that they think I am blowing the severity of the pain out of proportion, saying things like "well i didn't have that kind of pain when I was pregnant" well yippie fucking yeah for you asshole, your lucky.Unfortunately I am an invalid so suck it. while it is nice to be off work,do they really think i WANT to feel this way? I would Rather be enjoying the last 7 weeks of my pregnancy. But their is not much I can do about other peoples opinions. and in the end I got more support than I could have ever hoped for from everyone else. Am I scared? yes, I am scared that I may lose my job over this, but legally I cannot. And i am scared financially, but we will be ok, it all comes down to my health and the health of this baby, which is much more important to me right now.

I started my first day of leave today, and while I didn't feel well physically, mentally i am much better, it helps when you know you can go lie down if your pain gets too bad. I went through baby gifts and folded some baby clothes, looked at the manual for my breast pump and took a nap. Rest is very important for me to catch up on, considering I do not sleep but three hours a night , roughly.
One of the cutest onsies that I got from people at work!

Thank you notes that I found!

THE NURSERY
Julia is coming over this weekend (god bless her) to help me finish the nursery! I am SOOOOO excited!!! I will def, post pics. Here is what we have done so far!

Before After! Before After!

Also week after next is my shower! I am so excited! Unfortunately my friend Michele wont be able to make it, her sister has thyroid cancer and she is helping her out, which is totally understandable, but she will be missed, I will however get to see alot of other people I haven't seen in ages, swollen feet and all!
Well enough of the endless babble I'm off to take a warm shower and lay on the couch and watch Young Guns, it just feels like a Kieffer Sutherland kinds of evening! MMMMMMM

A super nice surprise

So i walk ...or should I say waddle into work this morning, not feeling too good, sick to my stomach and with a throbbing swollen left foot,I Come around the corner and I see a blue ribbon hanging from a cubicle, and blue bags, gifts, and FOOD tons of food, i get to my desk and it is completely decorated with blue ribbons and :it's a boy" stickers, my co workers threw me a baby shower!!!!!! What a nice surprise!! They also had set up a waffle bar where George my coworker made Belgian waffles and they had ALL THE TOPPINGS THAT YOU COULD IMAGINE! Fruit salads, and my favorite Homemade double decker carrot cake! I couldnt believe it! i got all sorts of gifts, (this kid is going to have more clothes than I! A 268 pack of newborn diapers! Wipes, diaper bags, a booster seat and the breast pump that I wanted!! they all pitched in and got me my breast pump!!! That thing was waaaaaaaaaay expensive and I did NOT expect that at all!!! What a great bunch of people!

Well the hubby and I are going to go look at everything and enjoy the carrot cake! MMMM!!!!!