Drama

ok so here it is, a rare "normal blog post" from me, nothing about shopping or clothes or music or anything of that sort, things have been rough the past few weeks. and I sort of just need a space to dump it all. So i write this handy post, then it will be out of my system ,promise.

Financially this year has been hard, with me not getting paid for part of my leave, and our business not doing real well thanks to the economy, we have been scratching literally to get by. Most of Hudsons formula is put on a credit card because guess what? I can't afford 80 bucks a week (yes you red that right) on my salary! but I have to do it, because he needs to eat. but it's times like this that I really wish the whole breastfeeding thing worked out.!!!!

Christmas will be slim this year, and what we do have will be put also on credit, we mainly took care of the little man this year, but I also got a few small things for my parents and my hubby.
At least we will all be together....In the magic of the season.

But my parents.....well that's another story, my mother has had a host of health problems since pretty much her forties, after a major car accident when she was 43, she developed Fibromayalgia, a muscle condition that can cause great pain for no reason, she has dealt with it with a smile on her face for years and years, at 60 she got into another horrible car accident causing severe nerve damage and putting her in the hospital for weeks, she lost full control of her right arm, plus the accident aggravated the fibromayalgia, rendering her sometimes incapable of moving, and on a good day, barley moving, then the following year she got breast cancer, localized, it didn't spread, it was removed and she endured 6 weeks of radiation. She has always had severe depression (which I have also inherited a knack for with the fibromayaglia, but not nearly as bad as hers,they caught mine early)now made worse by the tamoxifen she is taking for the next 5 years ( thankfully they are trying to work that out) she has lung damage from the airbag hitting her so hard, (sarcardosis) ...sigh,.... it's very hard to watch, she is on disability and most of the time keeps a positive attitude, but then there are those horrible days she calls me in tears and I am scared for her, scared to death, thankfully my father is usually home with her. But its even wearing on him, and that causes other issues, all I have ever wanted was for my mother to feel healthy to feel good, all I have ever wanted to give her is a new body. And it's painful as hell not being able to help at all.the only real joy in her world is Hudson, and now she has developed a serious injury in her knee and cannot come to babysit him every wed, like she used to, this really doesn't sit well with her, because one, we live at least 45 minutes away and she barely see's him and two he is her only distraction. So i am trying to take him out on Sundays to her house, to ease that pain until she has knee surgery hopefully in Feb. or March.

this just all weights on me heavily, and around the holidays it's especially hard,then I go home and my husband may be stressed out and short fused about money issues, some days I feel like my world is falling in on me, the only one holding it up is my sweet baby boy, that smile....I tell you what....can pull me out of the deepest funk.

as my parents age, I am becoming more conscious about my own health, there is heart disease on my dads side,cancer on my mothers and diabetes in both. I KNOW I don't take great care of myself. I know I barley exercise, that my cholesterol is probably ridiculous, that I eat too much sugar, don't sleep enough (cant really do anything about that) don't eat well enough and need more vitamins, I want to get healthy now that I am in my 30's, but I am so tired that I never am able to stick to anything, I want to go to the gym after work but I miss my baby so much it kills me, but dammit! I KNOW the risks of not taking care of my self, I know this, so why cant I just do it? Why cant i stick to a diet, keep out of the sugar, and move more? it's frustrating, I attribute alot of it to lack of sleep and hormones.What cant I remember to sit up straight? push my shoulders back, take a freaking vitamin everyday.Some times I feel like giving up, but then I remember that I need to get healthy for my son, he deserves the world and I want to give it to him.

Don't get me wrong despite all of it's issues my life is pretty good, and I do love it, but I don't handle stress very well, and this time of year isnt helping. I love Christmas, i just wish I could enjoy it more........vent over.......

Word of the week.....

Ok so here is something new that I am trying, a "word of the week post'

I look like HELL here lol,it was 6 am this morning, what do you want lol, I definitley look like a mother who hasn't slept lol.

Favortie color obsession

Not feeling too well today, the baby is having major sleeping issues and I am just worn down and tierd beyond belief, may also be coming down with something, (FUN!!)

So i got on Polyvore and played around a bit. Here is what I would call a current color obsession, BUT I have been intrigued with this color from a very young age. It reminds me of antiques.

My aunt once told me that she hated the color "cobalt blue" because Cobalt treatments are what they used to give cancer patients back in the day,....figure she would take something so beautiful and crap on it.....But it's still my fave.

Blues by Heather5259 featuring 1928 jewelry

Items in this set:
Paul Costelloe Swing Jacket, Royal Blue, 10, 199 GBP
Cobalt blue bow front skirt, 23 GBP
Blue Guipure Lace Padded Bra, 7 GBP
Rock & Republic Celina (Blue) - Platforms, $279
CC SKYE - Kenzington (Electric Blue) - Bags and Luggage, $699

The Holiday hustle/wish list

Hey all, sorry I have been slacking on the ol blog lately, but I have been crating my butt off for Christmas. I will post pictures of my crafts as soon as I am done making the last of them.

I took some christmas photos of the little man on thanksgiving, (it was really the only time that he was dressed up) I cannot wait until my photo Christmas cards come in, yay!

Momma, Daddy and Baby

Here is my wish list for this christmas:

Gift Certificate to Sephora OR Ulta (Always the right fit!!)This Fragrance sampler set at Sephora, once you decide wich one you like, you can go into Sephora and get a free bottle!The YUDU, Home Screen Printing Kit, (this is my "in your wildest dreams" gift")Purses from Trophey Queen, mmmm Sparkly Naugahide mmmmmThese utlra fem ringsA grill pan! Enamled Cast iron Please!
These adorable head bands from Red Velvet Art!!NARS Tokaido Express Nail polish

A gift certificate from either Dante Lucci, or Bella Capelli for a spa treatment or

Manicure or Pedicure




Gift certificates to bath and Body Works or Victorias Secret so I can buy some smell goods!

Happy Holidays!!!!!

A room of ones own

Virginia Woolf said it best "In order to write fiction, a woman must have a room of her own"

Well in order to do some kick-ass crafts, I must have a room of MY own.

So this is the closest I could come up with, my old craft room is currently occupied as a nursery, so i now have to share the very tiny office space in the next room, with my hubby, Here is what I came up with, I absolutely love it.

I claimed this old cabinet we used to have in the bathroom, and put folded fabrics on the shelves inside,and in the bottom drawer I have all my jewelry findings and polymer clay, and tool organized. it's nice because I can now see everything that I have (which is quite a bit more than I expected) On the floor I put two drawers that hold my card making supplies. I also used an old toothbrush holder to hold my scissors and pens! I cannot WAIT to start making even MORE stuff, now that I have my own place to do it!

Crazy weekend

Oh my gosh I got so much done this weekend! Which surprises me considering Hudson had his four month shots on Friday and spiked a fever Friday night and most of sat. he was extraordinarily cranky and his left leg was swollen, poor dear, I hate getting him shots :( But I know they are necessary. He feels much better today and is back to his happy laughing self:)


I also managed to finish a Christmas project, my felt Christmas trees, Bill said it reminds him of the trees in Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer, or Jack Frost.

I like the way it looks in my pretty centerpiece on the table.

I also finished this fall hand sewn pin.Obviously a bit too late for this year.

Then began working on my ornaments for my Christmas gifts. Oh yeah, I am in felt heaven! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh :) I love Christmas crafts.

We are working on putting up our Christmas decorations, and I can't wait to see the look on lil Hudson's face when he sees the Tree all lit up in it's Christmas glory, I can't wait to take the family photo in front of the tree :) Too fun!

Hopefully my curtains come today, they were shipped on Friday, so they should reach my door soon. It will be so nice to have a little color in the house!

I also hung out with Julia in the Gordon Arts District yesterday, we went to the Room Service Christmas shop and Kitsch City, had some coffee and a HUGE chocolate chip muffin....

thanks Julia I needed that!

Well hopefully today will go by fast, as will whats left of the work week (THREE DAYS!!! WOOHOO! Then I am off for the Holiday!)

Bizzy Lizzy

Omg I have been in a complete craft coma lately, SERIOUSLY, it's a sickness, and what is up with me and felt lately? i am totally on this crazy felt kick. But i love it, so no matter.

I have been playing around with ideas for making my living room more colorful, when we first moved in the walls were white, we needed to paint quick and we had big purple couches, so i chose a very light tan color ( I still want to repaint it someday, but not anytime soon) a darker tan perhaps. My curtains are just cream and tan sheers, kind of blah. So I checked online and found a great sale at JC Penny's, and I purchased the curtains below in a sage green;which will offset my purple couch. here is the link to the full picture http://www3.jcpenney.com/jcp/X6.aspx?DeptID=60156&CatID=60193&GrpTyp=STY&ItemID=161c0b0&attrtype=COL&attrvalue=green&CMID=60156%7c60193%7cshopbycolor&Fltr=COL%3aEquals%3agreen&Srt=&QL=T&IND=61&cmVirtualCat=shopbycolor&CmCatId=6015660193shopbycolor Then I am going to make Turquoise throw pillows for the couch and love seat to really POP IT! I know your thinking, "wow turquoise, purple and green? but really it all works together very eclectically. And our ceramic lamp is turquoise so the pillows should highlight that.

Below are some pictures of living rooms that I really love, I love these color combos! SWOON!!!!

Don't you LOVE this color combo???

So elegant a beautiful!

Aside from redecorating; I am also starting up Christmas projects, making felt cone shaped trees, felt ornaments (for gifts) and this awesome felt mobile I saw online.

Would love to hang this in hudsons room!